I Love You
by A Sirius Crush On Moony
Summary: Sirius is in love with Remus, but it's unrequited. Or is it...? Slash RL/SB MWPP era.
1. Declaration

**Disclaimer : I don't own the characters or the places or anything blah blah blah **

**Warnings: Well, it's slash. So yeah. If you're on here reading this and you hate slash, get off :) **

**- Sirius loves Remus but it's unrequited... or is it?**

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"Can I speak to you?"

"Sure," I answered, putting down my book. Sirius looked frightened, nervous. He looked around warily.

"Umm, somewhere private..." he said quietly. I nodded.

"We'll go up to our dorm. James and Peter are in detention anyway," I said, getting up. Sirius followed me upstairs. Once we enetered the room, I closed the door and turned to face him. "So, what did you want to say?"

He hesitated. "Umm, well I kind of wanted to say that I-" he stopped.

"That you what?" I asked. He looked down at his feet, and stayed silent for a minute.

"I really _really _like you, Remus," he said quietly. I was confused.

"Aww, well I like you too, Padfoot," I said, smiling. He frowned.

"No, I mean I REALLY _like _you," he said. I then realised what he meant.

"Oh. Like in what way? Like a friend or.. more?" I asked.

"M-more," he said, keeping his eyes on his feet. "A lot more."

I bit my lip. I hadn't been expecting this. Not at all.

"Ah, cool," I simply replied, smiling at him.

"D-Do you, you know... feel the same way?" he asked nervously. My heart sank very low inside me. He was my best friend, nothing more. What was I supposed to say?

"Er-"

"Because I know you feel the tingling when we touch, I can see it in your smiles. And your eyes brighten when you see me, so, do you?"

"Sirius, I-" I felt terrible. "I didn't mean to lead you on. I don't feel the same way. I'm so sorry," I said, and I truly meant it.

"Yes, you do. I know you do," he said, putting his hands on my shoulders and shaking me. "Just admit it."

"Sirius. Really, I don't. I'm straight."

"Well Remus, everyone's straight until they're not," he said, hope clear in his eyes. I looked down.

"That may be, but I'm still straight. I didn't realise that you thought I... Liked you in that way. I love you, really. But only as a friend," I said, trying not to hurt him. He smiled at me.

"But that can change, can't it?" he asked, looking into my eyes.

"Um-" I didn't want to hurt him any more, but I didn't want to lead him on either. "Well, it's possible, but _very_ unlikely."

"But, you _could_ like me?"

"I don't think so, Sirius," I said. I saw the hurt wash over him. I felt so bad, but there was nothing I could do. "I'm really sorry." I pulled him into a hug (a friendly one) and I heard him sigh.

"I'll wait for you then," he said.

"Don't wait for something that won't happen," I said, knowing I was killing him inside. It was clear on his face.

"Right, well, I'll just go to bed, then," he said, his voice breaking slightly. I watched him as he walked over to his bed and slipped under his covers fully dressed. I heard the quiet sobs of the shaking figure of my best friend.

I knew that I'd never feel the same way. Ever.

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**Based this one on a true life experience. I fell for my best friend who is straight. Not great, I'll tell you :/**

**Anyways, review and I'll try to update asap, Thanks :)**


	2. Drunk

**Sorry for taking _forever_, but I have so many fics to update and so many exams coming up soo.. yeah.**

**Heres chapter 2 :**

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It had been playing in my mind like a broken record; over and over again. Sirius was gay. He liked me. I'd been leading him on. I'd been hurting him. As I awoke the next morning, I could remember the dreams. I shuddered. I'd dreamt of Sirius. Not just Sirius, but Sirius and me. Together.

He had been smiling at me, a warm smile. A friendly smile. Until he reached out for my hand and said, "I love you, Moony," and kissed me passionately.

That's the part where I would wake up, realise it was just a dream, and relax, only to fall asleep to another identical dream.

"Merlin, we're late!" shouted James, waking me up from my daydreams. I heard a groan from Sirius's bed.

"Wha's the time?" asked a tired Peter, rubbing his eyes. James checked his watch.

"9:00. We have Divination now," he said, getting up. I sighed. I couldn't be bothered for today, but I couldn't afford missing anymore days; I already missed enough from the Full moons.

"Why didn't you wake us up, Moons?" asked Peter, pulling on his trousers. I shrugged.

"Am I supposed to be your alarm clock or something?"

"Well, no. But you _always_ wake us up," he said.

"Maybe I had other things on my mind," I said crossly, walking into the bathroom to get changed. I could hear the conversation outside the bathroom.

"What's up with _him_?" asked Peter. There was an undecipherable noise (probably made by Sirius).

"You okay, mate?" I heard James ask.

"Me?" asked a tired sounding voice. "Wonderful! Great! I'm over the moon!" Sirius said, sounding drunk. There was a long silence. I decided I should leave the bathroom, incase anyone else wanted to use it. As I entered the bedroom, everyone turned to look at me.

"What?" I asked uncertainly.

"You okay?" asked James. I nodded.

"Just a bit tired, that's all," I said, avoiding Sirius's eyes.

"I'm just a bit tired, too," said Sirius, rather loudly. I forced myself to look at him. He had red marks under his eyes; where he'd obviously been crying, and he looked a mess.

"Ah," I said.

"Okay, what's going on with the both of you?" asked James. He was getting suspicious. "Sirius, you look like hell. And Remus, you're acting wierd."

"Oh, thankyou Jamesy," said Sirius cheerfully. "I look like hell, bu' at least I'm no' weird like re- _hiccup_ - mus!" he started laughing.

"Are you drunk?" asked Peter, eyeing up Sirius curiously.

_Hiccup_.

"Jus' a couple o' bottles o' Firewhiskey," _Hiccup_, he answered, grinning stupidly. I sighed.

"Why've you been drinking alcohol before you even woke up?" I asked. He glared at me.

"Oh," _Hiccup_ "Cos' o' you," he said, pointing a finger at me.

"What did he do?" asked James.

"Hurt me," _Hiccup_ "In 'ere," Sirius said poking himself in the chest, hard. "Ow!" he moaned. "See?"

"Padfoot... You just hurt yourself, mate. C'mon, we have a lesson, so try not to get caught being drunk," said James, walking towards the door.

_Hiccup_.

"He can't, he's not even dressed," I said, looking at him worriedly. Had I caused this?

"Ye' I'm dressed!" he said, jumping out of bed. "Y'see?"

"That's your pyjamas, dumbass," said Peter.

"M'still dressed," _Hiccup_ "M'not undressed, am I?"

"Well, no," said James.

"Y'want me to be undressed? M'already dressed!" he shouted. James and I exchanged worried glances as Sirius started removing his pyjamas.

"Erm Sirius, we don't need to see you getting undressed," said James, covering his eyes.

"M'not doing it for you an'way," said Sirius. "Show's for m'darl'ng Moony," he said, removing his sock and flinging it at me.

"I don't want to watch the show, Sirius," I said.

"Moony! Why?" he said, sounding extremely hurt.

"Sorry, but I'm late!" I said, unable to think of anything else to say to him. He pouted and looked at me in a strange way. I decided to turn away. I couldn't deal with this right now. I had lessons to attend.

"Bye!" shouted James. I waved a hand and ran out the door quickly. I was sure I could hear Sirius crying inside the dorm, and I felt completely terrible about it, but I couldn't help not being gay, and not being interested, could I?

I sighed, and made my way to my first lesson, which I was already extremely late to.

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**If you review I promise I will make Sirius do something _exciting_ in the next chapter :P**

**- Oh and I realise that Sirius went to bed fully dressed last night, but when he went to get his firewhiskey, he changed into his pj's :)**


	3. Chance

**Wow it's been ages! Sorry for not updating sooner but exams and other fics have got in the way.**

**Also, I apologize that this chapter isn't very long, but once again... exams... *curses all exams***

**I hope you like the chapter :) **

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The day dragged on and on, and Sirius never turned up. I was beginning to get extremely worried. Had he collapsed somewhere? Was he refusing to come down to class? I needed to check that he was all right, so when the bell finally rang for the end of Potions, I gathered my books and headed upstairs towards Gryffindor Tower.

When I got into to common room, it was completely empty. Maybe he was still in the dorm? I headed upstairs and opened the door. I couldn't see anyone, but Sirius's curtains were closed. I hesitated – maybe he wouldn't want me invading his privacy like this. I sighed and decided that I needed to see if he was all right, so I poked my head through the curtains.

Sirius looked up at me with wet eyes. I felt pity wash over me like a tidal wave. _Poor Sirius_.

"Hey," I tried. He sniffed and looked down at his feet.

"Hi."

"Umm.. are you OK?" I asked, sitting on the edge of his bed.

"Yeah! I'm great," he said with a false smile. He looked as though he was trying to hold back tears.

"Err Sirius?"

"Yeah?"

"Are you sure you're OK? I mean, you weren't exactly yourself this morning..."

"I.. umm.. I drink when I'm upset," he admitted. "I know it's bad for me, but I can't help doing it. It helps me cope."

"I'm sorry I upset you," I said quietly.

"It's not your fault," he answered miserably. "It's my fault for being such an idiot."

"You're not an idiot! Don't say that."

"I am! I fall in love with the most unattainable person ever, _and_ expect you to like me back. I can't believe I was so stupid!" he cried, wiping tears from his face. I hated seeing him like this. It killed me. He was after all, one of my best friends. I took a deep breath and pulled him into a friendly one-armed hug – I wanted him to know that it _was_ friendly and not anything more.

"People can't help who they fall in love with," I whispered in his ear. "I'm sorry you had to fall for me... I'm sorry I'm not gay."

"Couldn't you just give me a chance?" he asked hopefully, as I pulled out of the hug.

"Umm, I'm not sure that's a good idea Sirius," I answered, hoping not to hurt him even more than I already had.

"I know you're straight," he sniffed. "I just think you should try and be with me for a week or so. If you really don't like it, we can end it." he said, looking terribly upset by the idea of ending it. I sighed. When would Sirius realise that straight people just wouldn't kiss people of their own gender?

"I don't want to," I answered bluntly, and I saw the hurt in his eyes.

"Please Rem," he begged.

"Honestly Sirius, being straight, I don't want to kiss or touch you," I said truthfully. "Even if I gave you a chance, and I tried it, I would probably freak out if you tried to do anything like that. I know that would upset you a lot. Sirius, I just don't want you to get hurt any more. Sorry."

"But you're hurting me by _not_ trying!" he shouted, new tears glistening in his grey eyes.

"Sirius?"

"What?"

"Do you like girls?" I asked calmly.

"No... they're disgusting!"

"What if a girl asked you to try it with her? How would you feel if she tried kissing you and whatnot?"

"That's completely different. You're my best friend! You're supposed to make me happy!"

"Well if you're my best friend, then you should keep _me_ happy too," I said. "And being with you wouldn't make me happy. I'm sorry," I got up and headed for the door. I could hear him crying. I turned around to look at him – curled up on his bed with his head in his arms shaking from crying so much. I sighed.

"Sirius?" I asked softly. He lifted his head to look at me.

"Yes?" he answered in barely a whisper. I saw a tear trickling down his cheek.

"I hate being in this position! I don't want to hurt you, but I'm hurting myself if I'm not hurting you!"

"I'm sorry I started this," he said sadly.

"It's not your fault at all Pads! Really, listen... You _are _my best friend and I don't want to see you upset. Don't get too excited, but I'll give it a go. I'll try being with you for a week." His face lit up immediately.

"You will?"

"Yeah. But don't be surprised if you end up more hurt at the end of it, because I'm pretty positive I'll still feel the same way at the end. And don't be surprised if I flinch away at any touches or kisses..." I warned. What the hell was I doing? I didn't want this at all! But seeing the happiness in Sirius's eyes was enough to make me accept. Merlin, he was head over heels for me!

"Thankyou Remus! Thankyou so so _so_ much!" He ran up to me and pulled me into a more-than-friendly hug. I sighed into it and relaxed. I didn't want to ruin it for him, so I hugged him back – I was his boyfriend after all. Urgh, that sounds horrible. His _boyfriend_.

I wondered whether he wanted to tell James and Peter. I certainly hoped not, because I didn't want this to be spread around, and Peter had a habit of spreading things.

"Are you planning on telling anyone?" I asked him.

"Not if you don't want me too," he answered. I pulled out of the hug.

"No, can we please keep this just between us?"

"Yeah sure," he said, smiling at me cheerfully. I smiled back. This was going to be a long, painful week...

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**Please drop in a review :)**


	4. Draught of Peace

**Again, I'm so sorry for the long wait! I should be ashamed of myself :( **

**This chapter is a little longer than my recent ones, so I hope you'll enjoy it a bit... :D**

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I fell asleep already regretting my decision. I knew I would only hurt Sirius more at the end of it, but I knew that if I didn't give him a chance, he'd keep begging me to try it. I needed to get it out of the way, and it would be hard.

It was breakfast the next day, and Sirius had kept smiling at me all morning, so I smiled back, happy to see that I could make him happy. He was seriously over the moon, and who was I to take that away from him?

It began to get awkward when he sat next to me at the table, and I felt him take hold of my hand. My immediate reaction was to flinch, which I did, but I didn't remove my hand from his. I decided if I was going to give him a proper chance to prove that it would work, then I'd have to let him show me his affections – as uncomfortable as I was doing it. I knew Sirius had felt me flinch away at first, but I felt him relax next to me when I didn't pull away.

It was hard to eat breakfast with one hand and try to hide the lack of my right hand from James and Peter, but I somehow managed. When it was time for potions, Sirius finally let go of my hand as we left the table.

"Was that so bad?" he asked me as we made our way to our lesson.

"It wasn't too bad," I said truthfully. It didn't do anything for me, but if it made Sirius happy... then that was fine for me. He beamed at me, and I smiled back.

"By the way, this is Day One. Yesterday didn't count."

"Yeah, I know," I said. As if I needed to be reminded. He looked at me.

"If you decide you like me at the end of this, will we just carry on as friends, or will you continue being my boyfriend?" he asked.

"As unlikely as that is," I said. "I will continue being your boyfriend _if_ I end up liking you at the end of the week, but Sirius?"

"Yeah?"

"As I said, it's _extremely_ unlikely that will happen, so please don't get your hopes up," I said. I saw sadness in his eyes for a moment, but then he smiled.

"I'm just happy I have this chance," he said. "You're amazing."

"Er, thanks," I said, smiling back at him.

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In potions, we were told to work in pairs, and as I expected, Sirius chose me as his partner. James looked rather put out by this – I shrugged at him to show that I couldn't help it that he'd picked me. Poor James was stuck with Peter, who was terrible at potions, but I pitied Sirius the most. I was probably the worst at potions in the whole year. I had a habit of making things blow up. I'd always been good at my other subjects, but potions was something I'd never be good at. We were brewing the Draught of Peace, which was supposed to be very difficult to make.

"Here," said Professor Slughorn as he appeared by our table. He handed me a second cauldron, filled with all of the ingredients to make the potion.

"But Sir," said Sirius. "We already have a cauldron and the ingredients."

"I know that," Slughorn replied. "But Mr. Lupin here has a habit of blowing things up, so it's always good to have spare."

I felt myself going red. I was _really_ terrible at potions, and Professor Slughorn seemed to enjoy embarrassing me about it. Sirius just laughed and shoved the second cauldron to the side.

"Don't worry. I won't let you blow it up," he assured me, and I nodded quickly.

"Then I suggest you don't let me anywhere near that cauldron," I warned. He looked at me disbelievingly. "Honestly! It'll blow up in your face!"

"Don't be silly," he said. "I'll just make sure you don't do anything wrong, and if you do, then I'll fix it before it can blow up."

"Fine," I muttered. "But don't blame me if you end up in the hospital wing later."

"Cool," he grinned. "Let's get started. _Incendio_." He started the cauldron fire and I instinctively backed away. He looked at me questioningly.

"Just to be safe," I said.

"Ah, OK. Right, so we have the gallon of water in the cauldron. Pass me a pint of bubotuber pus," Sirius said. I hesitated. Looking through the ingredients, I found the bubotuber pus and handed it to him.

"Is that a pint?" he asked. I shrugged.

"I have no idea. How do you measure a pint?"

"Look here," Sirius said calmly. He handed me a measuring jug, and pointed to the 'one pint' mark. "Pour the pus in there until it reaches that mark, OK?"

"Of course!" I said, laughing.

"And you're supposed to be smart," Sirius rolled his eyes at me. I poured the pus until it reached the 'one pint' mark, and Sirius poured it into the cauldron.

"Now what?" I asked, feeling more confident.

"We wait until it turns a deep red colour," Sirius answered. "So if you were making this potion alone, it probably would have blown up by now, right?"

"Probably," I admitted. He laughed and shook his head. I looked at the potion to see that it had turned a deep red. "Hey Sirius," I said, pointing at the potion. He stirred the potion, and I watched as it turned to a normal red colour.

"Pass me the powdered moonstone, please," he said. I grabbed it and thrust it into his hands, not wanting to waste too much time, in case something happened to the potion in that time.

"What's wrong?" I asked, when he sat down after adding the powdered moonstone.

"We have to leave it to boil for ten minutes, until it turns a shade of purple."

"Oh," I said, relieved. I sat down next to him, already tired from making only _some_ of the potion.

"So," he said. "You're not doing too bad."

"Only because you're watching to make sure I don't mess it up," I answered, sighing. "Why am I so bad at potions?"

"You're not bad at it," replied Sirius, smirking. "You're horrendous at it."  
"Thanks Sirius," I said dryly, rolling my eyes at him.

"I'm only kidding," he said, nudging me. "You're great at the theory... it's just the practical."

"I guess," I said, yawning. Potions lessons always seemed to make me feel tired. I jumped out of my seat when someone spoke from behind me.

"M'boy!" said Professor Slughorn rather loudly. "You haven't blown it up yet!"

"No, Sir," I said timidly. "Sirius is guiding me."

"Ten points to Gryffindor!" he said. "Five each."

"Ha," laughed Sirius. "You earned house points for not blowing something up."

"Shut up," I muttered. "Nobody's perfect. I bet there's something you suck at."

"Not really," Sirius grinned.

"I bet there is," I challenged. "And I'll find out what it is."

"If you say so," said Sirius, winking at me. Was he trying to flirt? I wasn't sure, so I just smiled back at him.

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The potion finally turned purple, so we were forced to get back to work.

"Right, Rem," Sirius said. "Get that container over there," he pointed to a container at the side of the table. "Pour the syrup of hellebore in there, and add the frozen ashwinder eggs. They should mix together by themselves."

I did as I was told, and, like Sirius said, they began mixing together. I grinned. I'd never managed to succeed something like that.

"We have to wait until the two ingredients mix completely, and then we pour them in there."

"We pour them in _there_?" I asked hesitantly. "Are you sure about that?"

"Yes, it says in the book," Sirius said, re-reading it.

"You positive?" I asked again.

"Yes!"

"OK then," I said. Being good at potions theory, I knew that the mixture of ashwinder eggs and powdered moonstone created an explosion, but I wasn't planning on telling Sirius that. When the two ingredients finally mixed together completely, Sirius lifted the container and I took a few steps back. He looked at me questioningly, while pouring the ingredients in.

"Why are you backing aw- ahhhhh!"

_BOOM_!

I couldn't contain my laughter. Sirius went flying backwards as the potion exploded, and his hair and face were black. He stood up abruptly. Everybody in the room was laughing at him now, and he did not look amused.

"Well done!" said Professor Slughorn cheerfully. "You've done it correctly!"

"Then why did it blow up?" whined Sirius.

"Because we mixed ashwinder eggs with powdered moonstone," I said, and he glared at me.

"You could've told me it would blow up!" he hissed, and I laughed.

"Oops," I said, grinning.

"Excellent use of knowledge there, m'boy! Another ten points to Gryffindor! Mr. Lupin, will you escort Mr. Black to the hospital wing please?"

"Yes, Sir," I said.

* * *

Sirius followed me out of the classroom, groaning in the background.

"What is wrong?" I asked finally, after a lot of whining and groaning. He sounded like Padfoot.

"I look horrible," he complained.

"It's not too bad," I said. "I'm used to it. Happens to me _all the time_."

"I know, but at least you look sexy when you get blown up," said Sirius. I felt my cheeks reddening and looked at the floor.

"No I do not," I said. "I look a mess."

"Believe me, you look sexy," Sirius said, winking at me again. "You always do."

"You're lying," I said. "I know I'm not sexy."

"No, siriusly! You're incredibly sexy!"

"Well... thanks, I guess," I answered, embarrassed. It still felt awkward when he said things like this to me, but I knew I'd have to get used to it for this week. "C'mon, let's get you to the hospital wing, then."

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**Oooh poor Siri XDD He got blown up hehe :D**

**I don't know if the making of this potion is right, but I got my information from .**

**Also, I made up the whole ashwinder eggs + powdered moonstone = _BOOM_!**

**xDD**


	5. Sexy Voices

**N'aww I'm falling for this story. It's growing on me haha... **

**Thanks to everyone who's reviewing :D I really appreciate it XDD**

**Here is chapter 5!**

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After Sirius was allowed out of the hospital wing, we had to head straight to Transfiguration, where we snuck into two empty seats at the back. We were lucky that Professor McGonagall didn't catch us – she was too busy lecturing James over why dungbombs weren't allowed in the classroom.

"But I-"

"Five points from Gryffindor," McGonagall said sharply, turning her attention back to the rest of the class. "Now, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted was that as many of you know, it is the fourteenth tomorrow. Why is that important, Mr. Black?"

Sirius froze beside me and shrugged. "I don't know, Professor."

"Does anyone know what tomorrow's date is important?" Professor McGonagall asked, scanning the room. Lily raised her hand. "Yes, Miss Evans?"

"It's Valentine's Day," she said.

"Exactly," said McGonagall. "And tomorrow, at seven o'clock pm, there will be a Valentine's dance which you are all required to attend – with _or_ without a partner."

"Why do we _have_ to go?" asked Amos Diggory. "Can't we just stay in our dormitories if we don't want to go?"

"Under Professor Dumbledore's request, I _do_ mean that you will all have to attend."

"I don't want to go to a stupid dance," muttered Marlene McKinnon. "

"Miss McKinnon, I suggest you speak to the headmaster if you have any problems with attending the dance. Now, it will be taking place in the Great Hall, and you are to dress in formal clothes. There will be wonderful food and drink, including some very extraordinary potions which aren't usually given out to students, so you should make the most of this opportunity."

"What kind of potions are there?" asked James.

"I'm afraid I can't tell you that yet, but you'll find out soon enough. Any other questions?" asked Professor McGonagall.

"How long will it be on for?" asked Shannon Bowler from Hufflepuff.

"It will last till midnight, where we will announce the winners of our best couple and our best dancers," said McGonagall. Lily raised her hand again.

"Will there be any prizes for the winners?" she asked.

"There _may_ be," said Professor McGonagall. "So I suggest you all choose your partners wisely."

The room filled with murmurs and whispers. I saw James glance over at Lily and grin, while she gave him a rather rude hand gesture back.

* * *

The rest of the lesson consisted of people whispering about who they were going to ask to the dance, and I was happy to be out of the lesson at lunch time.

As we headed back to the Great Hall, James and Peter caught up with us.

"Hey guys," James panted. "Guess who I'm going to the dance with?"

"Who?" I asked.

"Evans," he said smugly, grinning. I exchanged glances with Sirius, but it was he who spoke.

"She said yes?" he asked.

"Well, not exactly," James said. "I haven't asked her yet."

"Well then you can't say you'll be going with her," I said, shaking my head. "What are the chances she'll actually say yes?"

"Zero," muttered Sirius.

"You'll see," James said. "Who are you going with, Pete?"

"Me?" he asked in surprise, as if it was unusual for anyone to address him.

"Yeah," I laughed.

"Shannon in Hufflepuff is alright," Peter said, turning a rather interesting shade of red.

"From the colour of your face, I think she's more than alright in your head. Am I right?" Sirius asked, grinning as the colour in Peters face deepened.

"She'd say no if I asked her though," Peter said sadly. "I'm not good looking enough for her."

"If she's shallow enough to say no because of your appearance, then she isn't worth it Pete," I said, smiling. "And besides, _I_ think you're a good-looking guy."

"You do?" Peter asked in surprise.

"Yeah," I answered. "I mean, you aren't the _best _looking guy in the year, but you're not the worst either. I think if you ask her, you could have a chance."

"Really?" he said, grinning.

"It's true," said James. "Go and ask her."

"I can't, though!"

"Why not?" I asked.

"I'm nervous," Peter said. James rolled his eyes.

"Do you think I would have gotten this far with Evans by being _nervous_?" he asked.

"Um, no offence mate, but you've got nowhere with Evans," Sirius put in quickly.

"If I was nervous," James continued. "She wouldn't know who I was. As it is, by being such an irritating flirt, she knows me well, and that gives me a better chance with her."

"So you want me to _irritate_ Shannon?" Peter asked, confused.

"Peter, don't listen to James," I said. "Just go up to her and ask. If she says no, then there are plenty more fish in the sea."

"Ok," Peter said. "I'm going."

He got up from the table and left, looking a little more confident than his voice sounded. Just as I began eating, I heard a few female voices, and looked up to see a group of three Slytherin girls standing by our table.

Lisa Parkinson was standing at the front with a huge grin on her face. Behind her was Veronica Smith, who was batting her eyelashes flirtatiously, and Helena Greengrass, who was twirling a strand of her hair dreamily. They were all giggling excitedly behind Sirius, who turned around to face them.

"Um, can I help you?" he asked. They all fell into a fit of giggles, and Sirius looked at me helplessly.

"We... I mean _I_ was just wondering if you would like to come to the dance with me," Lisa said, running her hand through Sirius' hair slowly. He flinched away quickly.

"Don't _touch_ me!" he spat. "And no. I do not want to go to the dance with you."

"You don't have to be so rude about it," she said angrily, flouncing away from the table, leaving Veronica and Helena standing there giggling. Helena stepped forward.

"So, would you go with _me_ instead?" she asked. I shared an amused look with James as Sirius pushed her away from the table. Suddenly, Veronica sat down at the Gryffindor table and threw her arms around Sirius.

"So you chose me, then?" she asked, staring dreamily up into his eyes. He backed away, with a look of disgust on his face.

"I did _not_ choose you," he said, getting up from the table and motioning for James and I to follow him. We did as he wanted, leaving the lonely Slytherin by herself at the Gryffindor table.

* * *

"Bloody girls," Sirius muttered angrily.

"I'd have said yes," James said. "Especially to Greengrass. She's gorgeous."

"Well I don't want to go with a Slytherin," Sirius said. "They're all vile."

"No they're not," I interjected. "Not all of them, anyway."

"I'd rather go with a Gryffindor," Sirius said, as if I hadn't spoken.

"Not Evans!" shouted James protectively.

"Of course not," said Sirius. "I have my eye on someone."

I tried to ignore how he looked pointedly at me while he said it. I couldn't possibly go to the dance with him! People would see us together, and they would _assume_ that we were together...

_We are together_, I reminded myself sadly.

"Who are you going to ask then?" James asked Sirius. He thought for a moment whilst looking at James, and then he turned back to me. He grabbed my hand unexpectedly and looked into my eyes.

"Remus," he said slowly with a smile playing on his lips. "Will you go to the dance with me?"

I didn't know what to do. If I said yes, everyone would know that Sirius and I were supposedly gay (which I _wasn't_) but if I said no, he'd be completely heartbroken. I also reminded myself that I'd made him a promise that I'd try to be with him for a week, and this, getting in the way wouldn't change a thing. Sighing, I answered.

"Yes Sirius, I'll go with you."

James looked between the two of us with a confused expression, and I shrugged at him. Without warning, I felt Sirius' arms wrap around me, pulling me into a warm, tight hug which lasted for about twenty seconds before I was dying for air.

"Are you two... er... gay?" James asked finally. I shook my head quickly at him.

"I'm not!" I said.

"Then why are you going to the dance with Sirius?" James smirked.

"Because he made me a promise," said Sirius. "I... well... I adore him. I wanted him to give me a chance, and he wouldn't because _apparently he's straight_, but I don't believe him," he said with a wink. "Finally, he gave in, and he's giving me a week to prove to him that he really _does_ like me back, so he's officially my boyfriend. That's why he said yes."

"Ah, I see," said James. "So you adore Remus, then?"

"Yeah," said Sirius, grinning. "He's absolutely wonderful."

"I am still here, you know?" I said, waving my hand dramatically at the pair of them.

"I know," purred Sirius in a low, sexy voice. _No!_ I thought frantically – _I didn't just refer to Sirius' voice as sexy. No way!_

"I haven't been able to take my eyes off of you," he said, running his hand up my arm, sending a shiver down my spine.

"That's nice," I choked. "I'll just be... going... upstairs now."

"I'll come with you!" Sirius said, rushing after me and grabbing my hand. I really wasn't comfortable with him flaunting our 'relationship' in front of the school; I wasn't comfortable with him holding my hand full stop. Though it did surprise me that however hard I tried to pull away, I just _couldn't_. My hand wouldn't let go of his.

* * *

"So," Sirius said, after a while of silence. "What are you doing up here?"

We'd been standing in the dorm for a minute or so, doing absolutely nothing. I laughed, and looked at him.

"I was just getting... I don't know... _uncomfortable_ down there with all of those people around," I said truthfully. "I didn't actually want you to come with me, but... you're here, so... um, it's up to you. What do you want to do?"

"I want to kiss you," he said without hesitation. I stared back at him, dumbfounded.

"You what?" I asked stupidly.

"I would like to kiss you," said Sirius, winking. I bit my lip.

"I don't want to kiss you," I said, and his smile faltered.

"That's because you don't know how amazing it'll feel," he said. I shook my head.

"I don't like the idea of kissing you. You're a guy... I just don't _want_ to kiss a guy," I answered, trying to stay calm.

"You're my boyfriend though," Sirius reminded me. "You're supposed to kiss me."

"Please don't force me into it," I said.

"I wouldn't ever force you into it," Sirius replied, with a tone of shock in his voice. "_Never_. I would just like to _try_ kissing you. I mean, half the school would love to kiss me! Just, _please_... give it a try."

"_Half the school would love to kiss you_," I repeated, laughing. "You're so full of yourself."

"Admit it," he said. "It's true."

"I guess," I answered. "Proof of that is at lunch today... all the girls were drooling over you."

"I want _you_ to drool over me," Sirius said. I wrinkled up my nose.

"That sounds wrong," I laughed at him.

"Ah, you know what I mean," he said, rolling his eyes. "But really Rem, will you kiss me?"

"Sirius," I breathed. "You know I don't want to. Also, I _know_ I'm supposed to be your boyfriend but you can't expect me to just be able to kiss you – just like that. You're my best friend. It'll feel weird."

"I understand," Sirius said. "But will you at least kiss me this week?"

"Maybe," I answered, although I knew I wouldn't _ever_ kiss him. The thought of kissing my best friend made my skin crawl – it was repulsing. The look in his eyes made me regret my feelings though. He looked so hopeful and excited, while I knew that he had absolutely no reason to be hopeful.

"That's all I ask for," he said, smiling. "We should get going though, lunch is almost over."

"Yeah, good idea," I said, glad of the change of subject as he grabbed my hand and pulled me away from the dorm.

* * *

**Oooh I wanted them to kiss, but I had to hold back -sigh- XPP**


	6. Maybe

**Hey there :D I wanna say thanks for all of the wonderful reviews :) They're awesome :DDD**

**I'm going on holiday to Greece on Saturday, so I won't be updating again for about 15 days probably D: **

**I hope the fluffiness in this chapter makes up for it, though :DD**

* * *

The rest of the day was slow. I tried my best to put up with Sirius' compliments, and tried to ignore how secure I felt when he held my hand. It was because he was my friend... right?

Of course it was. The whole 'having feelings for Sirius' shenanigans started because of Sirius _wanting_ it to happen. It was just him getting to me, and I knew that was all it was. I was straight. End of.

After dinner, I found myself being pulled away from the great hall by Sirius, with a huge number of eyes following us curiously. I coughed.

"Um Sirius?"

"Yeah?"

"You shouldn't hold my hand in front of everyone," I whispered. "It gives off the wrong signs."

"You're my date for tomorrow," said Sirius. "We want people to _know _we're together before showing up as each others' dates, right?"

"I guess," I muttered. "I just don't want people to think it's real."

"Why not?"

"Don't worry," I said, trying not to hurt his feelings.

"No. Tell me," he demanded, looking at me right in the eyes.

"Fine.. I... just _don't_ want to appear as gay," I said. "I'll have no chance of ever getting a girlfriend, and people will begin watching me more closely... you know what they could find out if they began watching me more closely?"

"I know," Sirius said. "Sorry."

"Don't be sorry!" I said quickly, grabbing his arm. "I know I promised you that I'd be with you for a week and it must be frustrating that I won't hold your hand, but we could do it in the dorm..."

"We could _do it_?" Sirius asked, smirking and raising his eyebrows suggestively. "Moony, I had no idea you were so kinky!"

"Wha-NO! Argh! Sirius!" I spluttered.

"In the _dorm_, too!" Sirius continued. "Do you want to add 'on the bed' to that sentence?"

"Sirius," I said. "Let's just go upstairs before I get bad images in my head."

"_Bad_ images huh?" said Sirius as we began walking upstairs. "You've been seeing the two of us going at it in your head then?"

"NO!" I shouted, flushing. "Let's talk about something else, _please_?"

"Fine," murmured Sirius. "So, how was your first day as my boyfriend?"

"It wasn't _too_ bad," I said. "I could've done with less compliments, though."

"But you're amazing!" Sirius blurted out. "How can I _not_ compliment you?"

"Exactly! You just did it again! It's just... a little strange for me," I said.

"I understand," said Sirius. "I'll try and cut down on the compliments."

"Thank you," I said.

* * *

As we reached the dorm, I flopped down on my bed tiredly.

"I think I'll have an early night," I stated, as I headed for the bathroom to get changed.

"Me too!" shouted Sirius. I rolled my eyes as I changed into my pyjamas and opened the door. What happened next, was _not_ what I expected.

"UGH! SIRIUS! CLOTHES _ON_ NOW! _PLEASE_!" I screeched as I found Sirius lying stretched out on my bed with only his boxers on.

"But-"

"-No but's" I said quickly, shielding my eyes. "Put on some trousers at least."

"So you're OK with me shirtless?" Sirius asked.

"Bleh," I said automatically.

"You can turn back around now," Sirius said. Hesitantly, I turned around to find him _still_ sprawled out on my bed, but with a pair of pyjama trousers on. He spoke again. "And what does 'bleh' mean?"

"Nothing," I said. "Er... why are you on my bed?"

"We're dating," said Sirius. "We sleep in the same bed."

"Ha!" I said, laughing. "Very funny."

"No, really," Sirius said. "_Please_, Moony?"

"No," I said. "That's just too much for me."

"For me?" Sirius asked, looking up at me with his large, grey eyes.

"Stop it," I said sharply, looking at the ceiling. He didn't answer me, and when I finally looked back at him, he was still wearing the same 'puppy-dog face'. He pouted a little, and I couldn't take it any more. "Fine!" I said finally. He grinned broadly and moved over on the bed.

"Thanks Rem," he said happily as I slunk under the covers with him. I couldn't believe I was _actually_ lying – in _bed_ – with Sirius Black.

"You always get your way," I muttered to him, turning so that I was facing the wall. I nearly jumped out of my skin when his arms slid around my waist, and his head rested on my shoulder. "Sirius!" I exclaimed, making him jump.

"What?" he asked innocently, snuggling closer into my shoulder.

"A bit... uncomfortable here," I said.

"Oh c'mon," Sirius said. "You love it really."

"Sure," I said, my voice thick with sarcasm. "As a straight person, I _love_ having my best friend lie in bed with me with his arms around my wait. Of course!"

"Aww Moony! Really? That's so sweet," Sirius said, and I could tell he was grinning.

"Shut up," I said.

"Why should I?" he questioned.

"Because I said so."

"You obviously don't mind _that_ much, that I have my arms around you," Sirius said, tightening his hold.

"Oh, and why not?" I challenged.

"You still haven't pulled away," he said. I felt my cheeks growing hotter.

"I was cold. I just need some warmth, that's all," I said, reassuring myself more than him.

"Ah, right," he said.

* * *

Neither of us spoke for a while – we just lay there, enjoying each other's company. I was getting used to his arms around me... it felt... nice. Then, I heard a soft whisper in my ear.

"I love you."

"I love you too," I whispered back. "As a friend."

"Couldn't it be more than that?" Sirius sighed.

"Sirius, I wish it was," I answered truthfully. "I really do."

"You wish you'd love me as more than a friend?" he asked.

"Well yeah," I said. "Imagine that. I know you love me, so I wouldn't have to worry about you cheating or leaving me. You know my secret, and you're OK with it. You're my best friend, and people say you should end up marrying your best friend. And well... it feels sort of nice with your arms around me."

"It does?"

"Yeah," I said, smiling. "But I'm straight, so it wouldn't work out."

"That'll change," Sirius said matter-of-factly. "You _think_ you're straight."

"I _know _I'm straight," I argued.

"Then why does it feel nice to you to have my arms around you?" he asked.

"I don't know," I said quietly. I heard Sirius sigh, as he rolled me over and grabbed my hand. I let him take it, as he pulled it up to his mouth. He kissed my hand briefly, sending a tingle through my arm. My breath caught in my throat as I looked into his eyes. They held so much love and caring in them, that I couldn't help smiling at him.

"I know _that_ had an affect on you," Sirius said.

"Maybe," I replied.

"Was it a good affect?"

"Maybe," I said again.

"Does 'maybe' mean 'yes'?" he asked.

I grinned at him. "Maybe."

Grinning back, he began tracing circles on my hand. It was incredibly relaxing and I let my eyes droop shut as he continued.

We fell asleep like that. I knew it would be awkward in the morning, but at that moment, I didn't care.

**###**


	7. Feelings

**Back from my lovely holiday, and I tried to update this asap :)**

**I love all of your wonderful reviews! You guys are awesome :DD**

**Here is the next chapter :)**

* * *

"Moony."

"Mmm?"

"Wake up."

"Mmm..."

"Get up!"

"OK."

"Moony? Are you awake?"

"Mmm..."

"It's Valentine's Day! Wake up, for me!"

I sighed and opened my eyes. It took a while for me to adjust to the light of the room, but when my eyes grew used to the brightness, I saw Sirius standing above me. He had a huge grin on his face and his hand behind his back.

"Sirius?" I said tiredly, rubbing my eyes and sitting up.

"I have something for you," he said, perching on the edge of my bed and handing me a beautifully wrapped present. I looked at the gift and then back into Sirius' eyes.

"I didn't get you anything, though," I said guiltily. "I'll feel bad."

"Doesn't matter," said Sirius dismissively. "Open it," he added with a smile. I slipped my finger under the wrapping paper and ripped it open. A small card fell into my lap, which I read out loud – even though Sirius obviously knew what it said already:

_'Remus,_

_I know it's not a lot, but I know you love chocolate. I would of given you something else, but I figured that I'll be able to give you an even better present tonight at the dance. _

_I wanted to wish you a fantastic Valentine's Day! I know you may not feel the same way as I feel about you, but I want you to know that no matter what, I'll always be there waiting for you. You don't have to pretend, and we don't have to go too fast. _

_I love you, and I honestly hope that one day, you'll come to love me too. _

_Lots of love and kisses from Sirius!_

_Xxx'_

I couldn't help smiling at the words he'd written down, and when I looked up at him, he was also wearing a smile. Rolling my eyes, I pulled him in for a hug. I felt his grip tighten as he wrapped his arms around me, and I allowed myself to relax in his arms. It was comforting. It felt warm... natural. When we pulled apart, I ripped the rest of the wrapping paper off my gift, and was delighted to see a nice box of Honeydukes chocolate.

"Thank you," I whispered.

"S'no problem," he said cheerfully.

"So what's this present I'll be getting tonight at the dance then?" I asked curiously, and I saw a blush creep to his cheeks.

"Er... that's a surprise," he answered. "You'll just have to wait."

I groaned. I hated surprises... especially when I knew I was getting one. What if I didn't like it? What if it was embarrassing? Oh Merlin, what if he wanted to _kiss_ me? I shuddered.

"You OK?" asked Sirius, who'd noticed the sudden movement.

"Just a bit cold," I lied, pulling the duvet around me. "I wish I'd gotten you something now."

"I don't mind, honestly," Sirius said, resting his head on my shoulder. I didn't protest, but let my head fall so that it was resting on his.

"Sirius?" I said.

"Yeah?"

"When did you start liking me?"

"10th June 1972," Sirius said sharply. I laughed.

"Siriusly?"

"Nah. I don't know. I think I've always felt different with you than with anyone else... you were always... I don't know... I feel like I was meant for you."

"You can do better than me," I mumbled quietly. "We weren't meant for each other."

"How do you know that?"

"Because if we were meant for each other, I'd feel the same way, wouldn't I?"

"And who says you _don't_ feel the same way?" questioned Sirius.

"I do," I replied. "I don't feel the same way, Sirius. I keep telling you this."

"I reckon you're lying," said Sirius. "Maybe you weren't to begin with, but I think you're falling for me."

"Yeah right," I laughed. "I'm straight. Straight guys don't just _fall_ for guys."

"Well... how do you know that you're straight?"

"I like girls," I said.

"I liked girls too," said Sirius. "Until I met you."

"This is different."

"How is it different?"

"Because... it just _is_. I don't like guys. End of."

"As I said before... everyone's straight until they're not. You may never look at any guys in your life, but then you may suddenly find one amazing guy that you know you can't live without. You just _know_ that he's the one. That's it."

"Is that what happened with you?" I whispered. He took a while to answer.

"... Yeah. That's what happened with me."

"But... how can you deal with it?" I asked. "Knowing that I'll never feel the same way?"

"I don't think that way," Sirius said. "I know that there's a chance that we can be together. I'm _sure_ of it. I just need you to realise it too."

"I'll admit," I said, taking in a deep breath. "I have been feeling a _little_ different around you lately."

"You have?" The amount of hope in his voice made me smile.

"Yeah," I replied. "But it might not be anything."

"We'll just have to wait and see then, won't we?"

"I guess."

* * *

The Valentine's Dance was the topic of conversation for most people that morning. Most people, that is, except for James. He'd been moaning since breakfast about how unfair his life was.

"I think she needs glasses," he said. "Hey! Then we'll be perfectly matched! I can't understand what she sees in Snivelly! He's greasy and nasty."

"He's been her friend since they were young," I said, and James glared at me.

"_AND_?" He roared. "She's supposed to go with _me_!"

"Hey, calm down!" said Sirius. "She said no. No big deal."

"_NO BIG DEAL_?" shouted James angrily.

"I'm going with Shannon," interrupted Peter happily. "I just asked her and she said yes straight away!"

"That's great," I said, smiling at him. James was still huffing about Lily saying no.

"She loves me," James said. "She just won't admit it."

"I know how you feel, mate," said Sirius. "I've been trying to get Remus to admit it too."

"Hey!" I said. "I _know_ how I feel!"

"Wait," said Peter. "Who does Remus supposedly love?"

"I supposedly love Sirius," I said, rolling my eyes.

"Like... _love _love?" Peter asked.

"Yep," grinned Sirius. "He's going to the Valentine's Dance with me, too!"

"Like... as a _couple_?"

"Unfortunately," I said.

"So what?" said Peter. "You're gay, then?"

"Yes, we are," Sirius said.

"I'M NOT!" I shouted, causing a lot of heads to turn. Turning red, I lowered my voice. "Sirius is."

"Right..." Peter said. "So you're not gay, but you're going to the Valentine's Dance with Sirius? How does that work?"

"Exactly Moony," said Sirius smugly. "How _does _it work out?"

"I couldn't exactly say no," I said.

"Why not?" asked Peter.

"Because I'm too irresistible," Sirius said with a big smile on his face. I shoved him.

"No, actually," I said seriously. "Because I promised that I'd be your boyfriend for a week to stop you from being so upset and miserable. That's why."

"I still think you're gay," Peter said. "_I_ wouldn't date a guy just so he's not upset over it. I just couldn't do it. It wouldn't feel right."

"Ah! There! You see, Moony?" said Sirius. "You must like me a _little_ bit."

I sighed. "Maybe."

* * *

The day dragged on. Sirius was getting more and more persistent with trying to convince me that I was gay, and I wasn't having it.

"Can you _stop_ please?" I said finally.

"Stop what?" he asked. The look in his eyes made me bite my lip. He hadn't expected me to snap at him.

"I don't know," I said. "_Stop_ telling me that I'm gay, when I _know_ I'm not!"

"Hey! I didn't mean to upset you... Rem? Oh, I'm sorry," he said, looking down. "I think... well, it's probably me just trying to convince myself more than you."

"It must be hard," I said quietly, not looking at him. "How did you come to terms with... you know... being gay?"

"I was scared at first," admitted Sirius. "I knew that gay people are often discriminated against, and I was afraid of what you guys would think... especially you."

"I wouldn't ever discriminate you," I said quickly. "I know what it feels like to be... _different_."

"There's nothing wrong with being different," Sirius said. "In fact, being gay is great. I can be myself now... no pretending to like girls... no trying to figure out my feelings. Once you come to terms with it, you feel relieved that you finally know why you've been having feelings for people you thought you shouldn't have feelings for."

"I don't want to be gay," I whispered. "It's just another thing to add on to my list of abnormalities."

"You're not abnormal," Sirius said. "Not at all. You're just unique – it's one of the reasons I love you."

"I think..." I paused, trembling slightly. "Uh... how do you know you're gay?"

"Erm... well... I guess... if you have feelings for a guy," said Sirius. "How else would you know?"

"Ok... but... I mean... If you had feelings for a guy," I said. "Does it mean you're definitely gay?"

"No," said Sirius. "You don't have to label yourself."

"I think I'm starting to like you," I said in a scared, rushed whisper. My heart was beating incredibly fast, but I spoke the truth.

"Really?" he said, with a grin.

"Yes," I said, closing my eyes. "I'm scared."

"It's Ok," said Sirius. "Don't be scared! Just... accept the feelings gradually. If you do that, then it won't seem so scary afterwards. Remember, I said I was scared at first too."

"But you're so comfortable with it now," I said, staring up at him in awe.

"If you're right, and you really _are_ starting to like me... you'll get more and more comfortable with time. Trust me."

"I don't know what's going on," I said, with tears in my eyes. Sirius gave me a sympathetic smile and hugged me. It was then that I really breathed in the smell of him. It was then that I revelled in the fact that I was touching him, and he was holding me. It was then that I decided that there was _something_ a little different about the way I looked at him, and I knew that I'd have to get used to it sooner or later.

**###**


	8. Valentine's Dance

**Hope you like :)**

* * *

"You look great, Moony... now let's go!" Sirius said impatiently after I'd spent ages trying to get ready. I groaned.

"I feel like such a girl," I muttered. "Taking hours to get ready."

"I don't mind," Sirius said, opening the door for me. "C'mon."

"OK," I said, taking in a breath and linking arms with him. We made our way down to the common room where there were a few boys wearing their best formal clothes. A few of them turned their heads and gave us funny looks, and I felt my cheeks grow hotter as I tried to think about something to take my mind off it. Sirius had seemed to start walking a little faster – maybe to escape the glares?

When we got out of the common room, he sighed and smiled at me.

"We're going to get that all evening," he said in a tone that sounded as if he was challenging me to call off going to the dance. I bit my lip and shrugged.

"Who cares?" I said.

"You don't mind?" Sirius asked happily.

"Well... a little bit, but... it won't stop me from having fun tonight."

"Good thinking," said Sirius with a large grin. As we made our way down to the Great Hall, we got many more looks, but I ignored them.

The Great Hall was dimly lighted, with the bewitched ceiling casting the light of the stars down into the room. All of the house tables had been moved, except for one long table with drinks and potions set out on it. There was a tent in the corner of the room, with a sign reading: _Want To Know What The Future Holds For You?_ Outside the tent was Professor Winters – the Divination teacher – wearing very mystical-looking clothes. In the other corner of the room was another tent with a sign reading: _Dare You Enter With The One You Love?_ Underneath the main sign, there was a smaller one reading: _Can Cause Devastating Consequences_. I couldn't help wondering what happened in that tent, but I didn't say anything. A long tent lined one side of the hall, with a sign above it reading: _Hogwarts' __Only__ Five-Star Restaurant_ and the final tent in the room had a sign above it reading: _The Ballroom._ I supposed that was where the main Valentine's Dance would take place. All over the Great Hall were large, red squishy sofas suitable for two people. Already, couples were sitting hand-in-hand on these sofas, looking up at the stars. The music playing in the Hall was soft and romantic...

I became very aware of Sirius' arm brushing against mine, and I swallowed. My arm was tingling pleasantly, and I smiled inwardly to myself.

"Looks great," Sirius said, looking around the room again. "Where do you want to go first?"

"Umm," I looked around at the different tents. "Up to you, I don't mind."

"How about we go-"

"-HEY GUYS!" shouted James, running over to us. "I've been looking for you two _everywhere_."

"Oh," said Sirius. "Er... hey..."

"Hi," I said, smiling. "Where's your date?"

"Date?" said James.

"Yes," Sirius said. "You know... your partner... for the dance?"

"Oh," James said. "I don't have one... I just thought I'd hang out with you two for the night."

"_What_?" I said loudly. James jumped at the sudden outburst.

"Oh c'mon Moony... surely you don't _want_ it to just be the two of you alone anyway..."

"Funny," Sirius said in an annoyed tone. "But I asked Remus to the dance. We're here _together_, so that doesn't mean you can 'hang' with us. We want to be alone, right Moony?"

"Mmmhmm," I mumbled, looking at the floor.

"Whatever," James said angrily, marching away towards Shannon Bowler and her date. It took me a moment to figure out that Shannon's date was actually Peter, who looked completely different. His hair was styled differently than usual, and his clothes were less shabby. The usual acne that covered his chubby face was gone, and he looked much slimmer. I tapped Sirius on the shoulder, and pointed to Peter.

"How did he do that?" I asked.

"What? Oh..." Sirius laughed. "Wow, he's going to get into trouble... Professor McGonagall will notice that he's not as spotty and chubby as usual-"

"-That's not nice," I said. "He _is_ your friend... don't call him spotty and chubby..."

"Well it's true," sniggered Sirius, and I had to laugh back.

"True..."

"So, do you want to eat first?" Sirius asked, and I nodded.

We headed over to the 'restaurant' tent, and I was amazed at how big it was inside, and how beautiful it looked. It was as if we'd just stepped into a real muggle restaurant, although the magic in the room was difficult to miss. Every table was set for two, and there were Cupid's floating around the room, humming love songs in perfect harmony with one another. I was so amazed at the room, that I didn't notice when the House Elf walked towards us.

"Table for two?" he squeaked.

"There are _only_ tables for two," Sirius said.

"Woozy must ask. This is what is polite," said the Elf, walking away and gesturing us to follow. He led us to a table near the back of the room, and handed us a menu. "Woozy is your waiter tonight. If you should be ready to order, you should click your fingers and Woozy will take your order."

"Thanks," I said, smiling. Woozy disapparated and I looked at Sirius, feeling my cheeks get hotter again.

"It's really nice in here," I said, and Sirius nodded.

"Pretty romantic, huh?" he said. I blushed.

"Yeah."

"Let's take a look at the menu then," Sirius said, and I opened mine:

_**MENU**_

_**STARTERS**_

_Sweet Salad_

_Soothing Soup_

_Pasta Passion_

_Fruit Fancy_

_**MAIN COURSES**_

_Lasagne Love_

_Enchanted Eggplant_

_Valentine Vermacelli_

_Steak Spark_

_Lusty Lobster_

_**DESSERTS**_

_Glorious Gateau_

_Ice Cream Infatuation_

_Cherishing Cheesecake_

_Beloved Brownies_

_**DRINKS**_

_Butterbeer_

_Firewhiskey_

_Pumpkin Juice_

_Gillywater_

_Potion*_

_*Please ask the waiter for the full list of potions available._

When I looked up at Sirius I burst out laughing. He was sniggering away to himself.

"Wow. Thoughtful names for food," he said, laughing. "'Lusty Lobster'!"

"I know," I said. "It just doesn't sound right."

"I'm ordering it," Sirius said. "Just to see, you know, if it really is as lusty as they say," he winked.

"You do that, then," I said, nodding and re-reading the menu.

After a while, Sirius clicked his fingers to order the food, and Woozy appeared next to our table.

"Is Sir's ready to order?" he asked, looking between us.

"Yeah," I said.

"What would Sir's like?" asked Woozy.

"Can we have two Pasta Passion's, a Valentine Vermacelli, a Lusty Lobster-" He cast me a smirk. "-And two Glorious Gateau's?"

"And what will you be drinking?"

"Oh, one Butterbeer, and one Firewhiskey please," said Sirius, and Woozy nodded and disapparated.

"Don't get yourself drunk," I whispered to Sirius, and he grinned.

"Drunk?" he snorted. "As _if_..."

* * *

An hour and four bottles of Firewhiskey later, we were making our way out of the restaurant tent. Sirius had a stupid grin plastered on his face, and couldn't seem to walk in a straight line.

"You're not drunk, are you?" I asked in mock surprise. He hiccuped and shook his head, still keeping his grin on his face.

"ME?" he shouted. "Nah!"

"That's good then," I said, shaking my head. As we were walking towards the second tent, I felt two hands on my waist. Sirius started sqeezing me and rested his head on my shoulder.

"Mm.." he said dreamily. "I love you."

"Er... that's very nice, Sirius," I said, taking his hands away from my waist and pulling him towards the drinks and potions table. Behind the table was Professor McGonagall, who looked at us questioningly.

"You don't happen to have a potion to... er... sober him up, do you?" I asked. What happened next shocked me. She laughed. Professor McGonagall _actually laughed._ It wasn't what I expected.

"Has he been drinking too much Firewhiskey?" she asked me, and I nodded solemnly.

"Ah, not to worry," she said. "Here you go," she said, handing me a potion. "Mr Black... I suggest you drink this now."

"Why?" he asked vacantly.

"It'll make you even handsomer!" I said excitedly to him, and his grin grew – if possible – bigger.

"Gimme it!" he yelled, grabbing it off of me and gulping it down. Within seconds, his grin faded and he stared at me in confusion.

"You were drunk," I stated. He nodded, and then noticed Professor McGonagall looking at him sternly. He put on an innocent smile and shrugged at her.

"Everyone gets drunk," he said. "Even _you_," he added, winking at her and dragging me away.

"I told you _not_ to get drunk," I whispered to him.

"I didn't mean to," he said apologetically. "Sorry."

"It's OK," I said. "I wasn't angry or anything... it's just kind of hard to talk to you when you're like that."

"Sorry," he said, grinning. "Ooh, let's go into this tent," he said, pointing to the one that I'd been curious about earlier that read: _Dare You Enter With The One You Love? Can Cause Devastating __Consequences_.

"Are you sure?" I asked him, and he nodded.

"How bad can it really be?" he said.

"Devastating, apparently," I said uncertainly, but he grabbed my hand and pulled me towards it.

"Don't be a wuss," said Sirius, tugging me by my robes and pulling me through the door. I could barely see anything inside but thick purple mist. A gush of freezing cold air blew on us and Sirius shuddered next to me.

"I wish you would hold my hand," Sirius said quietly.

"Who's a wuss now?" I asked with a smile. I grabbed his hand anyway, and squeezed it lightly.

"YOU'RE HOLDING MY HAND! _MY_ HAND!" screamed Sirius.

"Umm yes," I said.

"Yes what?" Sirius asked.

"You just said I was holding your hand. Yes, I am..."

"I didn't say that," Sirius said in confusion. "How did he know what I was thinking?"

"How did who know what you were thinking?" I asked him.

"OH MERLIN! HE CAN HEAR MY THOUGHTS!" Sirius yelled, looking at me frantically. "OK Remus, see? My lips aren't moving, are they? And you can hear me, right?"

My eyes widened, and I grinned. I would be able to know exactly what he was thinking. But... did that mean...

"I can hear your thoughts too!" said Sirius. Oh damn.

"Don't listen to my thoughts then," I said. "It's not nice to... look into people's thoughts." Even though I was saying it, I knew I was also curious to hear what Sirius would be thinking.

"Curious, huh?" Sirius said. "How about this?"

I almost jumped out of my skin when a vivid image popped into my mind of Sirius and I kissing on Sirius' bed, shirts off, trousers off-

"That's _enough_!" I yelled. "Stop thinking about it!"

"I _have_ stopped," said Sirius. "But you haven't," he smirked, and I flushed.

"Well I can't help it after you implanted such a shocking picture in my mind!" I said in defence.

"Sure," Sirius said.

"Let's get out of here," I said promptly. "I don't like it." Except, I did like it. I – _strangely_ – enjoyed watching Sirius and I on the bed...

"Enjoyed it, huh?" Sirius said.

"_STOP_ reading my thoughts!" I said angrily, pulling him back out of the tent and into the fresh air of the Great Hall, away from the purple mist. I glared at him and he laughed back at me.

"What?" he asked.

"I didn't mean... I... ugh... you know..."

"You mean you didn't really enjoy watching us having sex?" Sirius said for me, and I nodded. Sirius nodded back seriously.

"Of course you didn't," he winked, and pulled me back to the potions table. "Shall we get a potion?"

"What potion?" I asked.

"Well, let's see what there is..."

There were hundreds of potions to choose from, with hundreds of students gathered around trying to get bottles. I wasn't really bothered about getting a potion, but Sirius seemed enthusiastic, so I went along with it. He picked up a piece of parchment on the table and handed it to me.

"It's a list of the most popular potions," he said. "Read it out."

"OK," I said. "Love Potion, Charming Potion, Irresistable Potion, Stick Potion, Luck Potion, Stripping Potion*, Radar Potion, Truth Potion, Hate Potion, Ugly Potion, Wish Potion."

"They sound cool," Sirius commented. "Especially that _Stripping _Potion," he winked.

"I'm sure it doesn't do what you think it does," I said, coughing to cover my embarrassment.

"Hey, McGonagall! Pass the Stripping Potion please," Sirius said. After giving him an angry glance, she handed him a bottle, and he started reading out the label. "This potion will allow you, and _only_ you, to see the person you love without clothes for a day. Hey! I'm taking this potion!"

"Oh no you're not!" I said quickly, grabbing it off him. I expected his smile to fade, but it just got bigger.

"Oh! You're going to drink it? Then, you'll like what you'll see," he said in a flirty voice. For a second, an image of naked Sirius popped into my head and I blushed madly. I gave another nervous cough and shook my head.

"No, it's OK," I said. "We can just give it to James... I'm sure he'll like it."

"You suck, Moony," whined Sirius. I grinned, and went back to reading the parchment.

"Why don't we each take a random potion? We can just... drink it. See what happens?" I proposed, feeling more and more nervous by the second.

"I like the way you think," smirked Sirius, reaching out with his eyes closed and grabbing a potion. He put his hands over the label so that neither of us could see what it was. "C'mon," he said. "You have to pick one too!"

"OK," I said, copying exactly what he had done. "Ready?"

"Yep," Sirius said. "3, 2, 1, GO!"

We both drunk our potions. I felt the warm tingle as the potion ran down my throat and into my body, but I didn't feel much different. Sirius however, was staring at me weirdly. I had a horrible feeling he'd taken the Stripping Potion, but he looked more confused than aroused.

"What is it?" I asked him.

"Nothing," he said, turning around and looking at various other people. He then turned to Professor McGonagall and cleared his throat.

"Er... excuse me, Professor?"

"What is it, Mr Black?"

"What does it mean if I can see a blue or red aura around people?" he asked, staring at people again.

"A blue aura means they are attracted to you. A red aura means they are in love with you," said Professor McGonagall. "It's the Radar Potion."

"Oh really?" Sirius asked with a grin. "Well there are a _lot_ of people in this room with blue aura's!"

"Wait!" squealed a girl next to Sirius. "Can you see an aura around me?"

"Er... yeah... ha! You're attracted to me!" he shouted to her, and she blushed and ran away. I bit my lip and tried not to blush – I had a feeling he'd seen a blue aura around me.

"Is there a blue aura around me?" I asked quietly, looking into his eyes. He smiled and shook his head.

"No, there isn't," he said.

"But... I thought I liked you-"

"-Well, you were wrong then," said Sirius, a grin growing on his face. "You have a red aura."

I froze. "_What_?"

"You love me."

"I _don't_!" I said in shock. "It must not work properly."

"You obviously don't realise you love me yet, but don't worry. I can wait."

"But I don't," I complained, huffing.

"Sure," he said happily. "So, what potion did you take then?"

"I don't know," I said. "I don't feel any different."

"Maybe it's just a wish potion or something?"

"Does this wish potion grant _any_ wish?" I asked excitedly. Sirius shrugged. I took in a breath. "I wish that I am no longer a werewolf," I said, closing my eyes. Nothing happened. I supposed I had to wait till the next full moon.

"I hope it worked," said Sirius, smiling."

"Me too," I muttered. "I have a feeling it didn't though..."

"We'll see," reassured Sirius. "Shall we go and dance now?"

"Yeah," I said.

When we entered the 'ballroom' tent, once again, I was blown away. The floor was filled with couples dancing, and the music was all very romantic and beautiful. All of the decorations were very elegant and grand, making it seem as if we were in a palace ballroom. Sirius had his eyes wide open as well, but for another reason.

"Literally _every_ girl in this school is attracted to me," he said.

"We knew that anyway," I said, rolling my eyes. "Let's dance."

After saying it, I suddenly realised I had absolutely no idea _how _to dance. Sirius grabbed my waist and pulled me closer, and I wrapped my arms around his neck. It was relaxing, and the position we were in forced me to look into his face. I couldn't help smiling as his eyes met mine, and a blush crept to my cheeks. He really _was_ beautiful. He made me feel safe and happy and loved. He made me feel special.

I couldn't believe what thoughts were running through my head, but I didn't try to push them away. The feel of his hands on my waist sent electrifying pulses through my body, and I instinctively leaned in closer to him... We were so close that I could feel his heart beating against me...

I wanted to kiss him.

There was no doubt about it. I _really_ wanted to kiss him, and I didn't care that I was in a tent filled with nearly everyone we knew. I didn't care what they thought, because Sirius and I were in a moment. It was our moment, and I wanted to make it even more special. I _needed_ it. His lips looked so kissable and I gripped onto him tighter as I closed my eyes. I moved closer to him, and I felt the most wonderful jolt in my stomach as my lips met his. It was as if nothing else in the world mattered except that I was with him, and we were kissing. It was heaven.

As I went to pull away, I realised that I couldn't. My lips were stuck to his. He tried to pull away too, and still, our lips stayed stuck together. I was aware that people were laughing, and James was laughing louder than anyone. He walked towards us.

"Too bad," he teased. Sirius pulled his hand off of my waist and stuck his middle finger up at James. I tried to speak but found that I couldn't. All I could do was look into Sirius' eyes and wish that our lips would break contact.

"Maybe James," said Peter from behind us. "Maybe we should try and help them..."

"Right," said James. "Of course. C'mon guys."

Walking out of the tent was both difficult and humiliating. We had to sidle our way out the door, with everyone either staring at us or laughing at us. We almost fell over a couple of times, and I could see that James and Peter were trying desperately not to laugh. As we got back into the Great Hall, a whole new crowd of people started laughing, and I groaned inwardly.

"Professor!" shouted James. "Do you know what happened to them?"

"Oh dear," said Professor McGonagall, who too, looked as if she wanted to laugh. "That would be the result of a Stick Potion. Any of you two drunk that tonight?"

I mentally slapped myself in the face and put my hand in the air.

"Well, the stick potion makes you stick to the first person you kiss _after_ you take the potion," said Professor McGonagall.

"How do they break apart?" asked James.

"It lasts 24 hours, I'm afraid," replied McGonagall. "Have fun, boys."

When I looked up at Sirius, I could almost guess what he was thinking. It was almost as though he was thanking the lords that he'd be stuck to me by the lips for 24 hours, and unfortunately, I felt exactly the same way.

* * *

*This potion is actually a creation of Rynne Lupin and it's from her fic 'Operation Attraction'. All credit goes to her :)


	9. Shut Up

**Sorry for the long wait, and I'm sorry this chapter isn't very long. Hope you enjoy though!**

* * *

After a while of trying to get by with our lips stuck together and not being able to speak, the teachers decided it was best that we stay in the '_Dare you enter with the one you love? Can cause devastating effects_' tent overnight. They had shut off the tent for anyone else, and let us stay there so that we could speak to each other through our thoughts. It had seemed like the perfect idea at first, but now... not so much...

**##**

'_Stop glaring at me. You're the one who came up with the idea of taking a random potion.'_

_'It's your fault you tried to kiss me.'_

_'Yeah right. You're the one who leaned in to kiss _me_. Which, by the way, I can't stop thinking about.'_

_'I know – I keep having to watch it replay in my head over and over again.'_

_'Once again, don't blame _me_ for that.'_

_'Oh, shut up Sirius.'_

_**Half an hour later...**_

_'Stop staring at me like that – it's creepy.'_

_'How can I _not_ stare at you? We're stuck at the bloody lips!'_

_'Close your eyes, then.'_

_'Why should I?'_

_'Because you're freaking me out.'_

_'Or turning you on?'_

_'SIRIUS! Shut up!'_

_**One hour later...**_

_'I'm tired.'_

_'Go to sleep then.'_

_'It's a bit difficult... you know? We're _stuck together_.'_

_'Just close your eyes and lie down.'_

_'I like lying face up by the way. You'll have to sleep on top of me.'_

_'Sirius...'_

_'What?'_

_'Shut up and go to sleep.'_

_**Five hours later...**_

_'WAKE UP, YOU FOOL!'_

_'What?'_

_'I need to turn over. I'm too uncomfortable.'_

_'Oh. My. God. You are so annoying.'_

_'Please Moony? Just help me turn over.'_

_'Fine'_

…

_'There. Now go back to sleep.'_

_'I love you, Rem.'_

_'Uh huh.'_

_'Don't you love me?'_

_'I don't love you.'_

_'Yes you do.'_

_'Go to sleep.'_

_'You had a red aura around you earlier...'_

_'That's nice.'_

_'You love me...'_

_'Sirius. Shut. Up.'_

_**Seven hours later...**_

_'Hey! I think it's morning.'_

_'Great.'_

_'Shall we get up?'_

_'I suppose.'_

_'Remus?'_

_'What?'_

_'I have to go...'_

_'Go where?'_

_'To the toilet!'_

…

_'Can't you wait?'_

_'Unless you want to be covered in my-'_

_'-OK OK! Let's just... take you to the toilet.'_

_**Half an hour later...**_

_'That was difficult...'_

_'Yeah.'_

_'Look, Remus... we don't have much longer now. We'll be out of this tent in about 12 hours.'_

_'And I won't have to listen to your annoying thoughts or accompany you to the toilet...'_

_'You love it really.'_

_'Ha! Sure...'_

_'You have beautiful eyes, Remus.'_

_'Thank you.'_

_'Aren't you going to tell me that _I_ have beautiful eyes?'_

_'… You have beautiful eyes, Sirius.'_

_'Aww really?'_

_'Shut up.'_

_**Two hours later...**_

_'There's nobody else I'd rather be stuck at the lips with.'_

_'Wish I could say the same for you.'_

_'Oh.'_

_'Sirius... I didn't mean it... I'm sorry.'_

_'Really?'_

_'Yeah... you're just a bit annoying sometimes.'_

_'Sometimes? So not all of the time?'_

_'No. Not all of the time.'_

_'Like when?'_

_'You weren't annoying last night... just before I.. _we_ kissed.'_

_'Is that why you kissed me?'_

_'… I kissed you because it felt right at that moment.'_

_'How did it feel right?'_

_'I loved you at that moment.'_

_'You did?'_

_'Yeah.'_

_'But you don't love me right now?'_

_'I don't know.'_

_'You like me, though?'_

_'I like you a lot.'_

_'That's what I like to hear.'_

_'Technically, you can't really hear me.'_

_'Technically... you love me.'_

_'Shut up, Sirius.'_

_**Four hours later...**_

_'No offence, but this is really boring.'_

_'You think this is more fun for me?'_

_'No... but-'_

_'-I thought you'd be enjoying yourself. Didn't you _want_ to kiss me?'_

_'But Rem... this is no longer kissing. This is just boring.'_

_'I agree. I wish we could just break apart already.'_

_'Same.'_

_'Maybe this is my lesson... never kiss Sirius Black.'_

_'Hey! I've kissed plenty of people without getting stuck to them for 24 hours!'_

_'Maybe it's a sign...'_

_'A sign for what?'_

_'Maybe we just shouldn't be together...'_

_'Don't be stupid, Moony.'_

_'Well it's just a thought.'_

_'A stupid thought. It happened because you took a Stick Potion. End of.'_

_'But-'_

_'-Shut up Remus.'_

_**2 hours later...**_

_'Surely it's been 24 hours already?'_

_'Obviously not.'_

_'I wonder how long we have left?'_

_'I sort of want to know and sort of don't want to know.'_

_'Why?'_

_'Just in case it's another 5 hours... I feel like I could kill myself in that time.'_

_'Wow. Am I really that bad company?'_

_'No... I'm just hungry and I need to yawn.'_

_'That's not too bad. Think about me. I've been holding back a sneeze all night.'_

_'Oh please don't sneeze!'_

…

_'I said _don't_ sneeze, Sirius.'_

_'You didn't say anything actually. You thought it. How do you expect me to be able to read your thoughts.'_

_'Because you can _hear_ my thoughts!'_

_'Who says I really can? Maybe I'm just psychic.'_

_'Shut up.'_

_**Forty minutes later...**_

_'Someone's coming into the tent...'_

_'McGonagall.'_

_'And she looks a right mess, too.'_

_'Sirius!'_

"Good evening, boys," said Professor McGonagall. "I have just come to inform you that your potion should wear off within the next hour. I would like you both to report to my office immediately afterwards so I can make sure there is no serious damage."

_'Yes!'_

_'Finally!'_

_'Under an hour to go...'_

_'I can't wait.'_

_'Siriusly...'_

_'Oh shut up.'_

_**Twenty minutes later...**_

_'I can move my mouth!'_

_'You can? Wait! So can I!'_

_'Keep moving it.'_

_'This hurts.'_

_'Who cares... we're almost back to normal now...'_

…

"YES!" Sirius screamed, and it was so great to finally hear his voice clearly and for real. I grinned at him and yawned.

"That was the longest 24 hours of my life," I said, grabbing his hand and pulling him out of the tent so I didn't have to hear his thoughts for any longer.

"I'm glad they were with you, though," said Sirius.

"Me too," I replied, gathering all of my courage and leaning forwards to kiss him passionately. Even though we'd been connected at the lips for a whole day now, the instant spark that I felt when our lips touched was like no other feeling. It was something I'd been longing to do since last night, and I wanted to do it right this time. It felt so right that I didn't want to stop, but eventually we both needed to breathe. We pulled away, and grinned at each other, both relieved that we actually _could_ pull away.

I looked into his eyes and said the first words that came to my lips.

"I love you."

**###**


	10. I Love You

"So everything is back to how it is supposed to be, then?"

"Yes."

"Nothing has changed?"

"No," yawned Sirius.

"Ok then," Professor McGonagall said finally. "It seems that the potion has worn off completely-"

"- Well of course it has!" butted in Sirius. "Do we _look_ stuck at the lips?"

"No," said Professor McGonagall. "But there can sometimes be after effects. However, you both seem OK, so I expect to see you both up bright and early tomorrow morning for lessons."

"Ok, Professor," I said, grabbing Sirius and pulling him out of the room. He sighed.

"Well, that was a pointless hour of my life," he said, putting his arms around me and pulling me close to him. I closed my eyes as he kissed my forehead softly.

"Should we go upstairs?" I asked.

"If you want..."

"I'm so tired."

"Well, let's go then," Sirius said, guiding me upstairs. All I needed was a good nights sleep to cure me from last nights horrors.

As we pushed the dormitory door open, we stopped. James and Peter were sitting on their respective beds, staring at us with weird expressions. It was sort of creepy.

"Er... hi," said Sirius awkwardly. There was no reply. Sirius looked at me, as if daring me to try speak to them.

"What's up, guys?" I asked, looking between them. Still, there was no reply. I looked at Sirius who shrugged, and pulled me onto his bed.

"Am I sleeping here tonight?" I asked him, trying not to smile.

"If you want to," said Sirius. "Do you want to?"

"Sure."

"You guys. Actually. Kissed." James said suddenly, as Sirius pulled me into his chest. He smelt wonderful, and as I held onto the front of his shirt, I couldn't help inhaling. He obviously noticed what I was doing as he looked down at me, smiling, and met my eyes, making my heart leap out of my chest. I smiled back.

"Yeah," Sirius finally said. "We kissed."

"You _actually_ kissed each other," Peter said in a disbelieving tone.

"Mmm hmm," I hummed against Sirius' chest.

"How can you guys do that?" James asked. "Ok, I know you may like each other but... _kissing_? I don't understand-"

"- Maybe I should question you next time you kiss a girl you like, then," Sirius said angrily.

"No, it's not that... it's just... you're both _guys_. How can you kiss each other without flinching or gagging or-"

"- Because maybe it actually feels nice," I said quietly. "Ok, it feels really nice," I added in a whisper to Sirius, grinning embarrassingly like a freak. He grinned back instantly.

"But it's... kind of gross," Peter said apologetically.

"Maybe it's kind of gross looking at _you_, Pete," said Sirius.

"Hey, that was uncalled for," said James.

"Well, what you and Pete just said was pretty uncalled for, too."

"It was the truth, though," said James. "It sort of makes us uncomfortable."

"How can you say that?" Sirius shouted, sitting up abruptly. "Sorry, Moony. I'm just pretty pissed off right now."

"It's Ok," I whispered, sitting up too.

"Look... maybe James and I just aren't comfortable with our two best friends being gay," said Peter, looking towards James, who nodded.

"Well, maybe if you're going to be _that_ discriminatory towards us, then you shouldn't be our friends," said Sirius.

"Maybe not," said James, pulling his covers over himself. "Until you guys learn that it's just not _right_. I thought it was a joke at first, but now... I just... eurgh... I don't even want to think about it. It makes me feel sick."

"You don't... wha- huh?" I said, unable to form a sentence properly. Sirius put his arm around me and squeezed me slightly. I tried again. "You d-d-don't want to be my... our f-friend anymore?"

"Not until you sort yourselves out," James said.

"I agree," said Peter.

"Well, why should I change the way I am just because some _idiot_ tells me to?" Sirius blurted out. "I don't _want_ to have you as a friend if you're going to act like that!"

"Hey... Sirius," I said. "Watch what you're saying."

"No!" he shouted at me. "Why should I? Haven't you heard anything he's been saying? He doesn't _want_ us as friends! Why should we make ourselves unhappy for _him_?"

"We were happy enough before this happened," I said, hoping he wouldn't take it the wrong way.

"_WHAT_?" screamed Sirius furiously. I flinched.

"I'm sorry," I said. "But it's true. I was perfectly fine before this all happened. I'd rather be happy _with_ friends than happy without friends."

"Maybe you were perfectly fine," growled Sirius. "But what about me? I was miserable. I hated my life. How can you take this away from me, Remus?"

"I'm sorry," I said.

"Sorry? Is that _it_?"

"Yeah. I'm sorry. We shouldn't have done this. It was a mistake."

"You can't be serious..."

"I am," I said, looking straight into his eyes. "I'm so sorry. I think we should just... try to pretend it didn't happen. Ok?"

"No, I won't," said Sirius stubbornly.

"Well, I will. Goodnight, Sirius," I said, making my way towards my own bed with tears in my eyes.

**##**

The next morning, I woke up early to take a shower before anyone else was up. I glanced towards Sirius' bed and he wasn't there. I frowned.

After taking a quick shower, I made my way downstairs for breakfast, where I spotted Sirius, leaning over his bowl looking a mixture between furious and miserable. I bit my lip inwardly hoped that he wouldn't kill me.

As I walked towards him, he didn't look up. As I sat on the bench opposite him, he didn't look up. Finally, I cleared my throat.

Nothing.

"Sirius?" I said anxiously. He didn't move at all, just staring down at the table. "Please talk to me, Sirius."

Sirius' head snapped up so quickly I nearly jumped out of my skin. "I _will_ talk to you, but not right now because I still can't believe what happened last night. You haven't done anything wrong apart from listen to a complete idiot of a "friend" and therefore breaking us up. Remus, what happened to that 'I love you' that you said last night?"

"I... just... I d-don't... well-"

"I love you!" he shouted at me, so loudly that everyone turned to watch them in silence. I felt myself going red under the stares of everyone. "AND I DON'T CARE! I DON'T GIVE A DAMN IF EVERYONE IS LISTENING!" he yelled to the other students. "Remus, I love you so much and you... you just... you..."

He broke off as his voice cracked and a tear rolled down his face. I closed my eyes and whacked myself over my head (internally). I didn't know what to do... he was crying and I felt so terrible about hurting him, but if I was with him, I'd have no friends.

"You know, this _is_ hard for me too!" I yelled back at him. "It's not just you that's going through a lot!"

"I don't want to speak to you right now," sobbed Sirius, getting up and running from the room. I sighed and groaned, getting up and walking out of the Great Hall. I was no longer hungry.

**##**

As I walked down the corridor towards my first lesson, I ran into James and Peter who looked at me with an odd expression.

"Where's your _boyfriend_, then?" James asked, peering around the corridor. I stared at him.

"We broke up," I said shortly, shoving past them.

"What? You _did_? That's great!" said James happily, smiling at me and walking alongside me. I turned to face him with something close to... _hate_?

"No it's not great actually," I said angrily. "I had to break up with because of _you_! You're so selfish."

"I just want this world a better place," James said. Peter nodded from beside him.

"You guys make me sick! How can you do this to us? We're your friends!"

"Don't tell me that you actually think that kissing a guy is _right_," Peter said, looking horrified.

"Yeah, I do," I said briskly. "Love is love, no matter what form it takes. I love Sirius and if you don't like it, stay quiet. I only broke up with him because I didn't want to lose you two as friends."

"Well everyone has to make tough choices," said James, shrugging. I felt like hitting him. I held back though, clenching my fists.

"I made the wrong choice then, I think. I was completely wrong. Why in hell would I choose having you two idiots as friends over having someone as amazing as Sirius as a boyfriend? I was so stupid!"

"So you're going to be gay again?" asked Peter. I didn't answer him. Why should I? Why does he deserve to know any of my business?

Without saying anything, I ran off in the direction of the class. I hoped they wouldn't follow as they hadn't had breakfast yet.

I hadn't felt so angry in such a long time. They were being completely out of order. I needed to find Sirius and tell him how sorry I was for my mistake.

**##**

Potions was an awkward affair – Sirius sat next to me, and I was too nervous to say anything to him. Especially since he looked as though one little word would make him blow up.

"Hey Sirius," said James, sitting down on the other side of him. "What's up?"

I saw Sirius grit his teeth. He didn't answer. He continued writing down what Slughorn was saying, making careful notes. I guessed it was to take his mind off of everything – Sirius _never_ took notes.

"Is this 'Ignore James Day' or something?" James asked angrily.

"Mr. Potter, get on with your work!" yelled Professor Slughorn from the front of the class.

I desperately wanted to make things right with Sirius. Sighing, I grabbed a piece of parchment and a quill and began writing:

_'I'm sorry. I was so stupid. I shouldn't have listened to James. Please forgive me.'_

I folded it and passed it to Sirius who eyed me suspiciously and opened it. I saw his angry expression falter for a second as he read my words, but then his face was angry again. He turned the parchment over and wrote his own message:

_'NOW you realise your mistake? You completely messed with my emotions. Decide now. Me or THEM?'_

I couldn't believe that even though he wasn't even talking, his words were cutting through me like knives. Slicing me apart and leaving me in so much pain. Why was he angry? I was forgiving him, wasn't I?

_'I choose you. I don't know what I was thinking last night. You're amazing, Sirius. I don't want to lose you.'_

His lips twitched a little.

_'So you would give up being friends with James and Peter for me?'_

I sighed and started writing.

_'Yes.'_

Now he really did smile. I smiled back slightly.

_'I forgive you. I'm sorry I snapped at you this morning too. I was just so angry.'_

I grinned at him.

_'It's okay. All couples have fights, right?'_

He nodded.

_'Only the best couples.'_

I didn't really know how else to reply other than;

_'I love you.'_

And that was it. It was the truth. I loved him and he loved me and it was the greatest feeling in the whole world. I didn't want to lose that feeling no matter what, and I knew that being with Sirius would make me happier than I'd ever been in my life. I loved him so much.

**~ THE END ~**

**A/N: Thank you to everyone who has stuck with me and this fic! It's been fun to write and I'm glad you all enjoyed it :)**

**I just wanted to say thanks to all of my wonderful reviewers:**

**_JJLiberty, The Scratch Man, Tondayala Cherise Dupre, IsThisOneTakenToo, Love Is BeastN, Coja, Mimichang, BetterIdeal, imSiriuslyLupin4you, Distant Lands, Angelusdeath, Ijusalfheim, Lizzy0308, Meet Jacques, Mokubahv, Zora's Revolve, MoMoHappy1, cake-error, sa5m, TechNomaNcer28, LadyMarauderYoung, MesserMessa, Stanleylouis, PenNameless1994, HermioneGrangerisME, cutegixie, Lexis-RandomThoughts Mo and Aaliyanna's-SeventhHeaven._  
**

**Originally, I was going to delete this fic after the first chapter because I was completely stuck on what to write next, but you guys all motivated me by saying you can't wait for the next chapter, so I decided to write more, so thanks :)**

**I'm sad that this fic is finished now, but remember, I have a _lot_ more Remmius fics out there so feel free to give them a read ;D**

**Again, thank you all for reading!**

**~ A Sirius Crush on Moony xXx**


	11. AN

**A/N - Ok, so I realise that the ending has left the story open for more chapters. This story _has_ come to a close, but I promise there will be a sequel where we can find out what happens with James and Peter.**

**It might not be from Remus' POV... it might not even be centered around Remus/Sirius but there will be a sequel if you're interested :)**

**~ A Sirius crush on Moony**


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